Trying To Think {open}

[Shoshi Ana]

Why was this so hard? It was not supposed to be hard, it was supposed to be easy. You were supposed to know what you wanted and then strive for it. But she had no idea what she wanted to do which was a problem. She was supposed to be making a decision, reply to a scholarship, several universities had asked her to attend their school. She had put in a wide range of applications for literature and languages, music and art and science and business because she couldn't figure out what she wanted to do but she never thought they would all offer her something now she had no idea what she wanted to do, which was proving to be a problem.

Of course who was to say she'd get to go to university this year, with the problems happening around Karakura Town and the other realms she may not even get the chance to go to university, that was not so bad now was it? So why did she feel sad about that? Perhaps it was the fact this war would determine so much for them all which had her worried, the enemy was strong, really strong and she was afraid, for the first time in a long time she was afraid, terrified actually but she had to overcome it, she had to become stronger.

Letting out a small sigh she rested her arms on the library desk covered in books she was looking over on different universities and ancient martial arts techniques before resting her head on her arms, this was proving to be a big problem. Her hands clenched into fists before relaxing and closed her eyes. Why was it something epic always had to come along, some big battle and problem, why was it there was no moment of just peace and quiet. Ana was starting to think there would never be peace, there would always be a problem that need fixing, there would always be a battle to be had, depressing thought really.

Suppose she couldn't make her mind up on a course not because she didn't know what she wanted to do but because she was unsure if she would ever get the chance with something always coming up, something always getting in the way of living and she wouldn't not fight it was not in her style, she would always fight, she would strive to win and become stronger, she would strive for freedom and the safety of the people she cared about but it was becoming harder and harder to do. There were answers she wanted, questions she had but there was no one to answer them which frustrated her. She wanted to know who she was all her friends knew who they were but she had no idea who she was, something wasn't right she could feel it and not just with the world but with herself.

Ah but such things such as her answers and figuring out what course to take at university would all have to wait, it'd have to be pushed aside once more so she and others could fight for what was right, to fight to live, to fight to keep balance. But something wasn't adding up when she thought about it. Yamamoto was missing yes, the Quincy claimed they had him. War was coming between the Shinigami and the Quincy for sure but then, why had Isshin Kurosaki seen so said clones running around and Ana had even sensed what she assumed was one before Ichigo's birthday, where there actual clones of their once enemies running around and why? What was going on exactly!

Hearing someone say something to her she frowned a little, what was that now, who was that? She blinked before slowly sitting up to see who had spoken to her.

[Inoue Orihime]

''Ahhh, chocolate flavour too!'' came Orihime's sweet as honey voice as she pressed her forhead up against the glass window display. She had just finished work and something sugary had caught her eye. She had to buy that, but maybe next time she'd already spent her loose change while she had her break earlier. Oh well it was something to remember next time.

She walked along the path her long and wavy auburn hair pulled forward over her shoulders that contrasted against a blue top she wore which then complimented her floor length pale purple skirt. She left her bakery uniform back at work and changed there when she had finished It seemed a bright day so far and Orihime was in a good mood well she was always bubbly anyway but she felt the need to help people today do some good deeds or something but not a cat in a tree or elderly lady to cross the road in sight. She'd keep an eye out for someone who needed anything until then she was left with her thoughts. It turned to the day she got injured she was doing fine now but still small scratches remained on her body and one on her face where she hadn't quite healed just yet.

Her friends had all come to visit her in hospital and they came to the conclusion it was a Quincy who probably attacked her she wasn't sure but she was familiar with the reaitsu and it did match her attackers. Her thoughts then turned to what she could eat tonight, oh maybe some kind of stew with a hint of chocolate thrown in for good measures, yeah that sounded good to her. Her thoughts then may of daydreamed in Ichigo but she shook her head she was getting so imaginary these days she had to stop herself.

Grinning to herself she stopped picking up Ana's reaitsu she turned and looked to the library she wondered if Ana had some cool project she was preparing for or maybe she was getting lost in an adventure novel. She walked inside curious and spotted her friend ''Ana'' she said only for a man at the front desk to hush her, oops.

''Sorry'' she said quieter and approached Ana ''That was a little to loud, I forgot where I was then'' she kept her voice quieter and softer.

[Shoshi Ana]

Noticing it was Orihime Ana gave her friend a small smile. After Ichigo had told Ana that his father had planned for them all to be trained by Zero Division members and would prepare for war Ana was seriously worried about Orihime. She wanted her friend to become tough and more confident in herself but she didn't want her friend to have to go to war. She was worried Orihime would be seriously wounded or worse. Though Ana didn't think asking her friend to sit out on the big fights was the right thing to do because if Orihime really wanted to fight then Ana had no right to say otherwise.

"It's ok" she said as she pulled out a chair for Orihime at the desk and patted it for her friend to sit down. At least Orihime was looking better to what she had been earlier that was a good thing. Ana looked back to her books on the desk, it was a mess. Frowning a little she closed those open and started cleaning them up sorting them into piles before sitting back in her seat and looked at Orihime once more.

Ana had often contemplated giving Orihime a lecture on 'love' and all of that, give her some books to read, try get her to be more open in the hopes she'd finally get the courage to confess to Ichigo. She could understand her friends fear though, Ana herself had spent months pondering her own feelings for Turasho before confessing them to him, she'd been lucky though that he liked her too. Ana didn't know if Ichigo liked Orihime like that or not, perhaps he did or maybe one day he would or maybe he wouldn't she had no idea, she didn't talk about that stuff with him. But for her friends sake, Orihime's, she wished she could get the courage to find out. After all what was the worst that could happen?

"What brings you to the library?" Ana came here often, she looked reading but she couldn't recall ever running into Orihime here before, did her friend come here often? "I'm glad to see you are looking better" she said with a gentle smile. Ana was still determined to find the Quincy ass who hurt her friend and make him suffer.

[Inoue Orihime]

Orihime was aware Quincy were no longer friendly she considered them an ally in Ishida but with the recent events they were clearly not her friend. She wasn't a war battlefield kind of person she saw how the like of Ichigo and Ishida fought and got tossed into a building and came out like it was just a scratch, their bodies were made more resilient against those kinds of attacks not to mention those guys just had skill in that area she could never use slick moves and speed or cut up an enemy like they were meat or something she wasn't scared of blood but she couldn't harm anyone it wasn't in her. But she could protect people in other ways reverse any damage done to those on her side so they could run back in and carry on with the fight. If she ever were to pass onto Soul Society the 4th division would be perfect they were in charge of medical and medicine.

Smiling she sat down and looked to all the different books scattered on the table ''Oh what you up to?'' she asked as she flinched a little sitting down she felt the bruise on her thigh shoot something sharp up her leg she forget she had bruises everywhere.

Orihime could probably do with some lessons in love and boys, she did wonder if she could understand them not that they were so completely alien to her she connected with men on occasions but never did she like any of them, no one in her class or whole school had ever caught her eye other than Ichigo. She wasn't aware of Ana confessing to Turasho she would of asked her how she had done it herself, but Turasho she remembered that guy and Ana had so bravely confessed she had played the situation out in her head and her imagination ended up taking over she honestly she was terrified of rejection Ichigo was not a romantic person and he closed himself off sometimes, but then again sometimes he did open up to her occasionally. She had always been content with just admiring and loving him and that being enough just feeling like she did about him made her happy and had no intentions of having Ichigo return her feelings but lately that wasn't enough she wanted him to know, she was getting more confident around him and not shy all the time who knows what she'd blurt out!

Orihime fiddled with her hairpins that sat clipped on her collar as she squinted her eyes looking around at the different sections of books. She had plenty at home but another one couldn't hurt, she loved to escape in one. Hearing Ana her eyes brightened glancing to her ''Uh oh well'' she began rubbing the back of her head ''I just finished working and was passing I actually picked up your reaitsu just thought I'd catch you...but now im here I could get some more books'' she smiled. She let her smile drop at Ana's recognition of her injuries getting better ''There not as bad now...I forget I have them sometimes'' she said.

[Shoshi Ana]

Blinking for a moment Ana glanced from Orihime to the books she had been piling up and shrugged her shoulders a little "I honestly have no idea." Ana said shaking her head before sighing a little "I was reading up on universities and their courses and then looking up courses and then I moved onto ancient martial arts techniques. I figured if I can get in some old techniques the enemy wont know what hit them. They'll expect something modern not old fashioned" she added.

Knowing Orihime had picked up on reiatsu had Ana frown a little more, she needed to be more careful it seemed, if an enemy picked up on it then anything could happen. It was fine this time as it was Orihime who was a friend but Ana needed to get more training in on that too it seemed, she couldn't have the enemy pick up on her reiatsu to locate her so easily.

"Best cure for a sore body is to curl up with a juicy book in hand" Ana said. She could do this easily enough, find a good book for her friend. They might have different tastes though in books, Ana really liked old fashioned books, ones with great language and descriptions, it was so hard to find that in books these days. They lacked the elegance they once had. People wrote about love and in a pathetic way too, they wrote about war and gore and didn't use the right text to convey their desire. Where books back in the day had it all, they knew how to write, how to convey their ideas, how to make the reader feel something and become captivated by the words of the page.

"What sort of book are you after?" she asked leaning on the desk as she looked to Orihime.

[Inoue Orihime]

Orihime raised her eyebrows, she was searching up universities probably trying to decided what one was for her but she had been side-tracked by martial art she smiled ''Oh, so your still deciding then'' she said she knew how easily you could get distracted by something else trying to concentrate on one thing but it wasn't really something you wanted to do and put it off for a while. But she herself hadn't decided if she was going to university ''Well we have yet to discover our grades...so have you had yours posted?'' she said maybe there was a letter at home waiting for her.

She nodded was a good idea to try and take the Quincy army by surprise ''Perhaps I should try that...um but I don't think I'd want to be on the front lines as it were'' she sighed. She would rather be a medic and help people. ''I know Kurosaki-Kun will ask me to join everyone in the war, but I think i'll just tell him i'll be in the 4th Division helping out the wounded'' she said she knew Ichigo would understand.

Orihime let a smile spread across her face she couldn't agree more a good book took her mind off her aching body, it was uncomfortable but there was nothing she could but allow time for her body to do it's magic she had never really tried to heal herself and put a shield up around her.

''Hmm...'' Orihime began when Ana asked her what books she was looking for ''Well...I love to read a good adventure book that will take my mind off things...but also some self help books you know a confident booster...im hoping to confess all to Ichigo'' she said but made sure she kept quiet.

[Shoshi Ana]

Shaking her head Ana softly said "Sadly no" she let out a small sigh as she looked over the books and frowned at them. Ana had spent the year teaching martial arts and helping her friends out, she had been training with Urahara to get stronger and learn more about her shield but also her portal creation, she wanted to be able to make one easily so she was no longer weakened by the state of making one. The training was tough for sure but it was working wonders.

Ana blinked a few times before smiling and closed her eyes, ah good old Orihime, she was such a laugh at times, so innocent, hopefully that would not get her seriously hurt one day. Opening her eyes she nodded her head "Yes. I graduated last year remember" she added "I was in the top three for the whole town" she pointed out not to brag or anything, she never bragged about such things, there was no point really in it. She was proud of her achievement though but even then she still had no idea what she wanted to do. She was hesitant to go to university for several reasons, exams and tests being one of them.

"I'd have thought you'd want to help the 4th Division with helping people heal during and after the battle?" Ana said, she really didn't want to see her friend hurt and the idea of them having to go to war worried Ana a great deal, she was seriously worried about Orihime. She was a gentle soul, she was the sunshine people looked to after a battle, if something were to happen to her, then who would her friends all look to when it was all over? Though Ana knew if Orihime really wanted to fight then she had every right to and Ana would aid her friend in having the chance even if she didn't want Orihime to fight.

A smile grew on Ana's lips as she let out a relieved sigh "You're the best healer you know, they'll be really lucky to have you helping them and Ichigo I am sure will respect whatever it is you choose to do. If you don't want to fight you don't have to, no one will force you and if they do you come see me and I'll teach them what for" Ana added with a nod and serious face. She knew Ichigo would respect Orihime's wish as she was sure if Orihime did fight he would be worried about her during the battle.

"Oh books about love" Ana said in a cheeky way before nodding her head "I am sure we can find something in that area. No magazines though ok if you do something in a magazine I will personally slap you, those things are full of rubbish, such a waste..." she added shaking her head "Hmm... let's see what we can find huh" she added standing up and looking around "Oh right romance novels are that way" she said pointing before walking over. So they wanted something with romance, and confidence and something with adventure.

"I'd lend you one of mine but it's not really full of adventure, it has though a good story about love and confession and inner struggle though" she added looking over to see if Orihime had followed her, if not talking to herself in a library or anywhere might look a little strange.

[Inoue Orihime]

Orihime tilted her head to one side a little unsure of Ana's smile but then she realised Ana was a year older and had already graduated ''Oh!'' she said putting a hand over her mouth. ''I forgot'' she laughed a little but then had to stop her laughing pretty quickly in case she got thrown out. She was impressed with Ana's top three in the year result ''Wow really? that's great'' she smiled. She was so far ranked 3rd but since the last round of exams she didn't know if that was still true she'd have to wait.

Nodding her head Orihime agreed she would be good in the 4th division for this war she'd go find Unohana and ask for her to give her a temporary place there during the war, and didn't a war last years! they may have to all live up in Soul Society for a while. Unohana could probably teach her some really good healing techniques and how to efficiently heal and quickly. Yeah she liked that idea but she knew she may come across a Quincy again if she was in the middle of a war and she have no choice but to defend herself. ''I plan to...Ichigo will probably up the front in the lead of defending Soul Society and probably Chad and Ishida would be too maybe even you Ana?'' she said. If Ishida planned on defending them he may just sit the whole thing out not wanting to be on any side? she wasn't sure what he was going to do when it come to the time everyone had to leave.

Orihime smiled widely as Ana complimented her abilities ''Thank you...it's taken me so long to get where I am...but there will probably be plenty of Shinigami passed to the 4th division in desperate need of help...'' she said and keep on looking after people was going to be her duty. She nodded seeing Ana would sort out those who dissed her for her decision to not fight she'd keep out of the way and try and put her faith in her friends that were going to fight out there. She would probably be letting her friends cross her mind in there thinking how they were doing.

She blushed a little about Ana's book suggestions but she needed the help and maybe just maybe months from now she could be in a relationship with Ichigo but it was a far cry right now but she could only imagine. She then looked more serous as Ana declared she was not to impose on anything the magazines told her she had read one once and the things it told you to do were embarrassing she recalled sitting in her hone reading a magazine and end up throwing it across the room in utter shock what it had told her to go up to her beloved and go do. ''Yeah it told me to do something I quiver at even now...I should just trust my own instincts in what to do or say to him'' she said.

She watched Ana looking for something for her and then she made a suggestion she nodded ''I'll read it...I finish books way too quickly'' she said. She had to get some confidence from these, all the women in these books all seemed to just come out with what they really thought and some ended well so why couldn't it for her? ''I just need to get it together and go sit and talk with him...I just need something a hint or a clue so that I defiantly know I wont get knocked back...'' she sighed but she had no clear way of knowing how Ichigo felt unless she bit the bullet and just asked it could end in embarrassment on both sides and he may not ever talk to her again but at least she'll know.

[Shoshi Ana]

Ana just nodded her head, yea she had been but to Ana it was not that big of a deal, she was pleased of her achievement and she hoped her friends all did well in their exams too. However just because Ana herself had gotten good grades didn't mean she knew what the heck she was going to do for the rest of her life.

Ana was unsure where she would be in the coming battle. She had a few ideas but she was unsure about them. She was thinking on seeking out Soul Societies enemies to aid in the battle for survival but that can be very dangerous, she also wanted to find out of Yamamoto was indeed dead and if the Quincy had been telling the truth and she even contemplating trying to find a way to get as much information about the enemy as possible but where she would be in the battle she didn't know. Maybe she would stay in Karakura Town as she was sure some Quincy would come here and if majority of people were fighting in Soul Society, who other that Isshin would defend humanity here?

Glancing down Ana shrugged her shoulders "I am unsure, there are a lot of roles one can play in battle but what mine is I don't know. Ichigo will fight at the front lines as he always does and you will heal people, Chad is likely to back Ichigo up and Ishida... I don't know what he will do, I hope he will help us all" In the end Ana was actually unsure where she stood in the grand scheme of things, what was her role exactly, where did she belong in this fight? She did know though the 4th division would be very lucky to have Orihime.

Magazines were stupid, they never had anything actually interesting in them, it was all rubbish in Ana's mind, which is why she never bought them, though she was guilty at times to check out the sports magazines or news articles as she called them.

Ana really thought Pride and Prejudice would be a great book for Orihime, if she had the patience for it. Ana personally thought it was a brilliant book, it was so well written and the emotions that flowed off the page were just breathtaking. There was romance and denial, there was a struggle between characters and emotions and love and hate and betrayal and so much more. It was an excellent book. People got rejected in it and it showed how some dealt with it and then how people realized they did love the person and they made up and well Ana was simply getting the desire to read it just thinking about it and smiled "Excellent it's a perfect book, so many lessons in it" she added nodding her head. If Orihime would like it or not was another matter.

When it came to Ichigo though Ana was unsure if he even liked anyone, he never showed any sort of romantic feelings towards anyone, maybe his brain was not wired that way. She however would like to think all her friends would find their soul mate - so to speak - and have a form of happily ever after. Ana glanced to Orihime "Hey... even if he does reject you you guys will always be friends and if he hurts you, you let me know" she added, Ana would beat the crap out of Ichigo but she didn't see him every hurting Orihime. Even if Ichigo didn't feel the same way Orihime did there was a 50/50 chance he might one day return the feelings or he might not, there was really only one way to find out.

Ana spotted the book she was looking for and smiled "Ah there it is" she said plucking it from the shelf. "Hopefully it will make sense, it might be a bit slow in bits but it's really good" she added smiling before her eyes widened and she grabbed Orihime's hands "We should role-play out what you want to say to Ichigo" it'd be great because Ana could hear what Orihime planned to say, maybe help her out a little.

[Inoue Orihime]

Of all the years Orihime had been doing this she had always been the back up for emergencies she tried to keep out of trouble and leave it to the guys who were strong enough to go up against the different species that kept popping up. She had never seen such diverse and unusual people in her life the source of their power coming back from something years back and now evolved. Quincy were just an evolvement of humans so in the distant future would everyone be spiritually aware it made her wonder about the future.

She did wonder where all these Quincy were hiding though, they had enough for an army so where could you hide them all, were they already in Soul Society? She was clear on her role in this war but Ana not so sure. ''Well....I always imagined at the front you can fight alongside Ichigo and the others well so I see...maybe you can come help me?'' she said. She knew Rukia would be there up with him there would be loads of foot solider shinigami and then the ones who posed a real threat were the Captains. She looked down a little then back up ''Ichigo and Ishida have been getting along recently...but he's distancing himself from the group'' she said with concern. She had tried to ring him to ask if he was coming along to the training Ichigo had texted her about, she was so up for this herself but Ishida didn't seem to get back to her. ''Your going to the Soul King's Palace right? Ichigo told you right?'' she asked.

Ana had suggested she read Pride and Prejudice she had heard of it but never read it ''Ok...sounds interesting to me'' she smiled. She'd read into that and see how people dealt with being rejected in there. She could take rejection I mean that was the worse thing that could happen he'd say he didn't feel the same way then she' have to act like she never said anything and probably ended up doing something embarrassing like walk into a lamppost or trip over only for him think she was a fool, she shook her head Ichigo was well aware she was a little bit clumsy sometimes only when she got embarrassed and this was defiantly an embarrassing situation about to go down.

It was true that Ichigo never spoke about any kind her girl he liked, or what his type was but Rangiku seemed and appeared to be his type so maybe she was in luck? who was she kidding. What if he just wasn't into girls at all! there she went again panicking she took in a breath calming herself. She doubted he was gay because he got so flushed when Yoruichi and Rangiku teased him he didn't really pay attention to girls unless they got suggestive and flaunted themselves in his face then he'd pay attention maybe she just had to be more flirty with him?

Hearing Ana's comforting words she smiled ''Yeah, you are right....he promises to be there for me so that means no matter how much of an idiot I make of myself right'' she smiled laughing a little. ''I don't want to lose him over this and knowing he will still be my friend after confessing makes me feel better...'' she said. She nodded to agree if Ichigo ever hurt her she get Ana onto him. She could imagine Ichigo being a good boyfriend he may not be around a lot because of his job, but when he was about it'd be great he was always so nice to her, respectful and polite when she knew Ichigo was hot headed it made her wonder why he was so nice to her, she was daydreaming again she shook her head snapping out of it.

Orihime sat up more and looked to the book Ana had found she smiled ''Great, thanks Ana I owe you'' she said she'd take that home and get lost in it. A big smile crept across her face as Ana grabbed her hands and asked her to role play what she would say to Ichigo. ''Hmm...ok well...I was thinking I would just call him up arrange to hang out...'' she began she had to get him on his own and somewhere quiet she could talk to him properly. She figured she wouldn't keep it too long because she may get interrupted by hollows calling Ichigo to his job, that'd be just her luck.

''I was going to speak with him about all what we had gone through and tell him how over the time my feelings had grown...'' she said but in her head she could just see the confused look Ichigo would give her.